


Charlie Dumps The Waitress

by annie_in_a_trench_coat



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: F/M, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-09
Updated: 2020-02-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:26:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22640014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annie_in_a_trench_coat/pseuds/annie_in_a_trench_coat
Summary: Charlie Kelly x Reader Ongoing Fanfiction
Relationships: Charlie Kelly & The Waitress (It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia), Charlie Kelly/Reader
Comments: 3
Kudos: 36





	Charlie Dumps The Waitress

3pm.  
On a Friday.  
Philadelphia, PA. 

“I’m just saying, If a woman were to suddenly start finding another woman attractive, there would be utter chaos in the streets.” Mac finished his point by placing his hands down on the bar top with a thud. Dee sat across from him with a quizzical look on her face.  
“Mac, you are aware that lesbians have existed for a very long time, right?” Her head was rested in her hand, her elbow on the counter. Mac took a step back, his hands now out at his sides, a look of distaste across his features.   
“Dee, I don't know what you're trying to say. I’m not talking about people from foreign countries, I’m talking about women that want to bang other women, want to marry other woman!”  
“Mac a lesbian is a woman who finds another woman attractive, both aesthetically and sexually.” Dennis shot in from his spot two stools down from Dee. Mac’s eyes opened wider than thought possible, and he took in the info.   
“Your telling me that women can be gay too??!!” Dee and Dennis laughed as Charlie entered the room. He had a bucket in his hand and a towel over his shoulder. All the attention in the room turned to him as he sniffed loudly.   
“You good Charlie?” Dee asked as she took a swig of her beer. He shrugged and wiped his hand on his pants.   
“I’m good, I was just testing out a new Rat killing method I dreamt about last night. It’s very complex and messy but overall I think it’s a more humane way of disposing-”  
“Yeah that's great, It smells like ass though. And I’m not enjoying it one bit, so if you could find a way to get rid of that, that would be just fantastic.” Dennis was cut off by the sound of the bar door opening up. The gang turned to find a young woman entering, she had a bag across her body and a notebook in her hand. Dennis shot up from his seat and smiled, “Hello, welcome to my pub. What might a nice young lady like you be doing here?” The rest of the group groaned in distaste as the girl smiled awkwardly and then soon froze in her tracks. 

“Sorry, I’m here to meet-” She looked confused as she took in those around her, “Dennis Reynolds?”   
Her blue eyes widened as she took into her view Charlie's form just a few feet in front of her. Charlie froze in return and kept his eyes locked on her.   
“Your here to meet me? Well I’m flattered but I don't remember calling for-”   
“No I’m here to meet someone else, but I just haven't seen you since high school…” She looked to Dee and Mac sitting at the bar and deflated. “Holy shit you're all here…”   
“Dude,” Mac began, “What the hell is this? Why is robot Y/n here?” Dee looked to Mac confused,  
“What's a robot Y/n?” She questioned spinning in her bar stool. Mac gestured to the brunette girl standing across from Charlie,   
“Her. From high school. The messy haired chick who was obsessed with robots and shit.” Both Dee and Dennis let a look of realization wash over their features as they pulled from their distant memory a teen girl from their hallowed school halls.   
“Nice to see you haven’t changed Ronald.” The new girl spoke breaking her eyes from Charlie’s for just a moment, and the boy awkwardly shuffled to face the gang. Mac stiffened up and slammed his fist down.   
“No one calls me Ronald! Mac! It’s Mac!” He had gone red in the face as Dee jumped up from her seat.   
“Oh my god… Yeah! I remember you. Wow, you look so much better now holy shit! Like I remember you being little and round and like so full of useless robot trivia.” Y/n shifted her weight from foot to foot in discomfort as Charlie placed the bucket he was holding down. Dee watched him and chuckled sarcastically. “You good Charlie?” She asked. He popped up and smiled awkwardly.  
“Yeah. I’m just putting down my bucket. Don’t wanna spill.” He laughed and Y/n did too, but Mac and Dennis could see that Charlie was acting more stupid then normal. The laugh that Y/n gave him sent him into a panicked state. “You know I work on rats. With the rats. No, I kill the rats. Bop’em on the head. Smash! Ahhhh! Yeah, this is, uh, this is a, um, bucket of liquefied rats actually. My latest method. Do you wanna see the rat soup?” He went to pick up the bucket of slush and everyone protested loudly, Y/n took a step back looking concerned.   
“I’m good, but thank you.” She moved to the counter slowly and placed her notebook down, “I cannot believe the memory trip I’m on right now. I mean I know Dennis and Dee from high school, but Charlie and… Mac, right? Yeah! I’ve known you two since grade school.”   
“Unfortunately.” Mac spoke earning a glare from Y/n. Charlie stood behind Y/n with that same ‘deer in the headlights’ look as he and Mac exchanged very aggressive non verbal words.   
“It’s been years, yes, but we are all adults now and might I add how wonderfully you grew into your beauty.” Dennis spoke pushing past Dee and resting in front of the brunette.   
“Dennis you do remember how you attempted made my life a living hell back then right?”   
He laughed awkwardly as a loud shout came from the back. 

“Ah! My new recruit is here! Excellent!” Frank chuckled as he came almost skipping out of the back office. The gang as a whole turned to face the short man now entering the room with a look of confusion.   
“What the hell do you mean new recruit?” Dee asked her eyes flashing between Frank and ‘Robot Y/n’. Charlie placed the bucket down on the ground and wiped his hands on the towel,   
“Wow I can’t believe it’s actually you. It’s been like forever since I’ve seen you.” The girl laughed softly and moved her hair from her face.  
“The one and only Charlie Kelly.” She beamed, “I haven’t seen you since high school! You look fantastic!” Charlie felt a blush he couldn’t help but feel creep across his face and turn the tops of his ears pink. He stumbled with his words, gibberish falling past his lips as Frank came walking up behind him. Dennis and Mac looked at the exchange with disgusted and confused eyes as Frank shook the girls hand.   
“Welcome to Paddy’s, we are so very glad you could join the team!” His voice cracked with excitement as shouts of distaste washed over the pair.   
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. Joining our team? Frank, what the hell are you talking about?” 

“I put out an ad for extra help around the bar; you know someone else to do Charlie Work. This broad responded so I hired her!”   
“Um, my name is Y/n. Y/n L/n.”   
“Yeah we know robot Y/n from high school.” Mac butted in, earning a scowl from the girl.  
“That was a nickname assholes like you gave me in high school because I had an interest in Transformers. I’m an actual human person, believe it or not.” She spat. Charlie took a step back, his eyes turning to Frank.  
“You hired her to do my job?” He asked, his voice softer than normal. Frank huffed,   
“No dipshit, I hired you a partner! So you stop asking us for help!” Charlie hummed in satisfaction and turned back to Y/n.   
“Look at that. Y/n and Charlie back at it again. Just like old times huh?” The girl laughed and stuck out her hand,  
“I’m looking forward to this, Kelly.” Her smile was infectious and Charlie found himself beaming along with her, shaking her hand vigorously.   
Dee turned to Dennis and Mac as Frank and Charlie took Y/n downstairs to show her the rat traps. “Did you guys see the way they were acting with each other?” Her voice was hushed as the trio left the room. Mac leaned into the counter and laughed dryly,  
“Yeah, what makes it even worse is she used to have like this crazy thing with Charlie in middle school. They would always walk together during the day. And she was the one who helped him create Nightman way back when. They used to write music and shit together, it was so gross.” Dee looked at Dennis and then Mac,   
“You guys think that this could be some kind of awakening for him? Like maybe he’s gonna get the hots for her, cuz’ it looks like she's gots the hots for him; know what I’m sayin’?” Both boys looked at each other, then to Dee, then they laughed.   
“No way.” Dennis began, “She is too high class looking to be with Charlie, and that absolute moron is never gonna dump the Waitress.” 

“Charlie Dumps The Waitress”


End file.
